Go to Sleep!

The sleep apnea saga continue. 

Bob was diagnosed back in October with severe sleep apnea (he has shallow breathing and has 52.3 episodes per hour when he wakes up to catch his breath). His equipment was ordered.  With the help of the respiratory therapist, it was determined that Bob should start with the least invasive equipment—the nose pillows.  These are the easiest to adjust to.  I had been warned that people with Alzheimer’s/Dementia do not adjust to the CPAP equipment, but I was upbeat and ready for the challenge. The equipment arrived in early November and the introductory period began.

Knowing that Bob would “fight” trying the CPAP, I tried to cajole him into wanting to give it all a try. Over the course of a week, I reminded him of these things over and over:

  • This is incredibly special equipment that was ordered for him by his doctor
  • I told him of other family members who wear a CPAP and are doing well due to it
  • I called it a breathing machine to make it seem less foreign than calling it a CPAP
  • I told him his heart would work better
  • I told him how much better he is going to feel
  • I told him his brain will work better and his memory will improve
  • I told him that he’d be awake more in the day and we could go on more adventures
  • I told him he could start by wearing it 5 minutes and work up to wearing it all night long

I also let the equipment sit by his bedside for the week before we attempted to wear it so he might get used to seeing it and accept it as something “normal”.

Did any of these techniques work?  Heck, no.

Bob would refuse to try.  Bob would let me put it on him and then quickly wanted it off.  He would wear it for 5 minutes and then pull it off.  He would swat at my hand and get angry.  He would say that the “colonel” spoke to him and told him that he didn’t need to wear it ever again. Bob would tell me that if I liked it so much, I could wear it.  He would tell me that he sleeps great.

I spoke with the Kaiser respiratory therapist to see if there were any techniques that they could suggest.  She said I had covered all bases.  She was able to lower the air pressure but even with the lowest air flow setting, Bob said he couldn’t wear it.  More like, wouldn’t try it.

Then along came my knee replacement surgery and I put all thoughts of getting him to wear the CPAP machine on hold.  I felt I had enough going on.

Then comes this morning.  Bob had slept from 8 pm to 6 am and then got up this morning and moved to his recliner.  Within minutes he is nodding off & on. I sat and visited with him a bit and in between saying a few words, he would fall right back to sleep. Mid-sentence.  It so painfully obvious that 10 hours of being in bed isn’t providing him much sleep.   I left him to sleep in his recliner and headed off to shower and dress.

Bob came into our bedroom looking a bit upset— he told me he thinks he is dying!!!!  He goes on to explain that he couldn’t wake up and he couldn’t make his eyes stay open. He seemed very shook up.  I consoled him that he wasn’t dying and that he was just sleepy. I attempted to tell him that he could start using the CPAP machine tonight and that he would get good sleep and not feel like he’s dying.  Did he like that idea?  Nope.  He said he just needed a nap and he’d be fine.  He has slept most of the day since then.

So it is one month post-knee replacement surgery for me and my focus will turn back to Bob and his sleep apnea. 

Pray for a breakthrough for us. Bob’s physical health and my mental health depend on it.


It’s amazing how kind words from total strangers can turn your day around.

Bob and I were walking recently at Ocean Beach.  Holding hands and slowly strolling. I was using my cane as my left knee is patiently awaiting replacement surgery. 

Ocean Beach is quite eccentric.  It’s not pristine and there’s an interesting mix of homeless, folks who live in their cars, hippies, fishermen, and surfers.  On this day there was even a goat.  And then there was us.  I am sure we stood out to most as we slowly strolled along the sidewalk heading to the pier.

I caught the eye of a young man who was smiling and staring at us.  He said, “You two are cute, have a nice day”.  I returned the greeting.  You have a nice day, too.  I really had a big grin on my face behind my mask as his kind words echoed in my head.

We strolled on down to the pier and started up the long flight of steps.  We must take the steps slowly and we both need to hold the railing.  A young spry woman quickly passed us by but as she did, she said, “I want what you two have some day”.  And on her way, she went.  What she saw in us is the us that I forget about sometime.  The us that still loves to be together.  The us that still holds hands.  The us that still looks out for each other.  The us that can walk together in silence and be totally happy.

To have two people remind me of what we have was such a huge blessing.  They may have seen that we were old and slow and infirmed, but they also saw that we loved each other.

God bless them for reminding us.  

“No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted”



Bob with 1 o has become more and more sleepy and fatigued.  He can fall asleep anywhere and anytime.  In the car is the most common but he also falls asleep at our dinner table, at restaurants, at doctors’ appointments and of course, in his recliner at home.

Sometimes Bob sleeps for a few seconds and sometimes the little nod-off becomes a nap.  Sometimes he’s talking and mid-sentence his eyes go shut and he’s out like a light.

Our primary care doctor has counseled me that Bob’s dementia is progressing and along with that comes more and more sleep.  The disease of Alzheimer’s/Dementia is much more than a memory disease.  It is a disease of the brain.  And since the brain is the control panel for all your body, every function of one’s body is affected.  Bob has many dementia related issues, and one is just being tired.

So you think I would just accept that and take it for what it is.  But no, I feel compelled to pursue other avenues and take myself down another path, dragging Bob along with me.  I started to realize that it is highly possible for Bob to have sleep apnea.  He doesn’t snore but he does sleep and wake all night long.  Sometimes he wakes with a gurgle sound and sometimes he coughs.  He is not aware of this and I’m really not sure if it goes on all night. All I know is that he can’t keep himself awake in the daytime no matter how long he is in bed “sleeping” at night.

In trying to get Bob tested for sleep apnea, I had to push his primary care doctor a bit.  He finally made the referral and told me it was because I was “relentless”.  I took that as a compliment!  Yes, I wanted to make sure that there was not anything we were overlooking that could be done to help Bob.  He may live a long time, or his days may be numbered—all I know is that I want Bob to have the best quality of life he can. Even with dementia.

The physician’s assistant at the Sleep Clinic was so helpful and caring.  She saw that I needed to have Bob be checked so that I could either move on or move ahead depending upon the diagnosis.  She also warned me that dementia patients do not take well to wearing the CPAP Masks that are used for sleep apnea patents.  She said that even if it were determined that he has sleep apnea, there is no guarantee that much could be done to resolve it.  Sleep apnea patents must want the benefits of the better sleep and that makes them willing to wear a possibly uncomfortable mask.  Most patients can understand that cause and effect and understand the benefits of wearing the mask.  Not someone with severe dementia.  To them its just another thing their caregiver is forcing them to do!

The testing for sleep apnea is much easier than I anticipated. I made Bob’s appointment and we attended a class on how to wear the monitoring device and do the testing at home.  Seemed simple enough.  I thought we were on our way to better sleep for Bob! 

Explaining the class and the monitoring device to Bob was the silliest conversations ever.  Imagine explaining it to young child.  Just a lot of disinterest and blank stares.  At bedtime, when I went to help him put on the monitor and finger probe, he protested.  I went through the explanation a few more times, always referencing his primary care doctor by name and telling Bob that his doctor was hoping to solve his sleeping problem and needed this overnight test.  I know he doesn’t care if I’m upset with him, but he wouldn’t want to make Dr. Nafes upset! So, he crawled into bed wearing the monitor on his left wrist and with the finger probe firmly attached. Whew…. all was good.

2 ½ hours later, I was reviewing the paperwork on the equipment and I realized that I had never pushed the START button.  Oh my, Bob had been asleep for 21/2 hours with out the monitor doing its job.  I was able to push the start button without waking him.  Whew…  disaster averted.

So we both slept.  I thought. At 5 am I woke up when I noticed Bob was getting out of bed.  I told him it was ok now to take off the monitor and I would help him.  I reached for his hand.  Didn’t find it the monitor.  Checked the other hand. Just in case.  Didn’t find it.  Yes, the monitor was not on either wrist.  It was sitting on the nightstand.  Bob had no idea as to when he put it there, but he did admit that he took it off.  He said he was fine and didn’t need to wear it.

I felt so defeated.  The equipment is only for a one-time use. Any chance of it collecting the required data was slim.  I couldn’t be mad at Bob. I was warned that he would have difficulty with the testing equipment—even though I thought it was so simple to do.  I just packaged up the equipment and drove to Kaiser Zion to drop it in the drop box.  Maybe they will be able to get an adequate reading from the short amount of time that he had it on his wrist.  Maybe.  Bob slept most of the way there and all the way back home.

So it took all of that long story to get to the important part.  At least this is the important part for me.

Was I pushing and trying to get this sleep apnea test for Bob’s best interests or mine?  Am I expecting him to improve or change? Am I not accepting that he has a rapidly progressing disease that brings so many health issues?  Am I still clinging to chances that something can be done to improve his mental and physical health? Do I have unreasonable expectations of his behavior? Am I making things difficult for him to try to make things better for me? Am I considering what is best for Bob? What are my motives?

Being entrusted with the care of another is scary.  How do I know I’m making the right decisions?

So, as I await the results of the sleep apnea test, this is my prayer:

Dear Heavenly Father, I need wisdom.  I have questions and situations to sort out.  Please fill my heart with Your wisdom and not my foolish desires.  Guide me on the path I should take.  Please make me a loving caregiver and not a relentless* caregiver.

*Relentless: Someone who is relentless is determined to do something and refuses to give up, even if what they are doing is unpleasant or cruel.

Susan “Worry” Manis

Our son Kyle always told me that my middle name should be “Worry”. I thought that my being overly concerned, planning ahead relentlessly, obsessing over options, and stressing over details were good things to do. Kyle took them for what they really were—a huge case of being a worry wart!!

As my faith in God has grown, my worries seem to fade a bit.  I often place my concerns in God’s hands and sometimes even leave them there.  I can rest in my belief that God is in control and try not to worry over those things I can not change.  Sometimes it even works, and I am worry free. The Serenity Prayer has become my mantra.

Now on the other hand, Bob never seemed to be too much of a worrier.  I guess that might be because it was my “job” and I worried enough for the both of us.  Maybe he had worries and concerns that he kept hidden.  He was a big tough cop and a man’s man.  Maybe he just didn’t openly share his worries like I did. 

So now the tables have turned.  Flipped upside down would be a better description. Bob worries about everything

  • We need to shut our blinds because there are people in our backyard that can see in.
  •  We need to lock every deadbolt as someone might want to come in our home. 
  • We need to hide the TV guide and remote away, so no one steals them while we are sleeping. 
  • We need to move to a different house as the trees behind the house are going to fall and crash our home.
  • We need to not park the car under the garage door as its going to come falling down and crash our car.
  • We need to drive in a different car lane or even a different road to stay away from boulders on the hillside. 
  • We need to watch where we are walking so, we don’t get “that sickness” from the red ants. 
  • We need to not go to close to the ocean because of sharks.
  •  We need to not use our backyard “fire table” as we will burn our house down. 
  • We need to turn the picture frames around so that they don’t catch on fire from the sun coming in the windows. 
  • We need to take a coat and gloves with us when we leave the house on a 95 degree day. 

The worries are endless.

I attempt to use logic and reason with Bob to no avail.  It is like I’m speaking to him in a language he can’t understand.  That’s the truth, actually.  He doesn’t understand.  I try to tell Bob with 1 o that I am going to take care of him, and he need not worry.  That doesn’t seem to help either.  The worries continue. 

So as Bob becomes more and more worried, I turn more and more of my concerns over to God. I try to reassure Bob and not make fun of his concerns just as I know that God cares for me in the same way.

I wonder if God is looking down on me and laughing just a little.  Is God saying to me, “remember how much you used to worry and I had told you I was in charge, why did you doubt me, why didn’t you trust me”?

I’m discovering so much as Bob and I go down this path.  And those lessons are not always about dementia and caregiving. 

Maybe my worry days are not over completely but I’m learning.

Philippians 4:6-7 From The Message

 Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.

Susan & Bob September 2020

Making Moments, Not Memories

Recently I have been thinking a lot about memories.  Too much sometimes.  I pine over the loss of Bob’s memory and cry over the shared memories that are no longer shared.  I can really work myself up thinking about all that Bob does not remember and I feel so sad that I can’t reminisce about past events with him.

My younger sister Marti and her husband Greg recently spent a week on vacation in nearby La Jolla.  They were gracious to spend some time with us and it was wonderful to be with them.  The best part was our shared memories and experiences as family.  We laughed over things that only our family would find funny.  My mom calling the chef “Heavy R” instead of Javier.  My dad lifting his little pinky up when he drank tea or coffee. It was so great to have shared experiences and memories. I have been missing that with Bob with 1 o.

Instead of focusing on memories with Bob, I am now focusing on moments.  Making enjoyable moments for both Bob and myself is my new goal.  Whether or not he remembers these moments (and he usually does not) isn’t going to be my concern.  I want to live in the moment and make those moments count.  I want to show Bob that I love and care for him and make his moments pleasurable.  If later in the day, he doesn’t remember that we walked at the beach or had a yummy lunch at a café, I’ll know that we did, and I’ll also know that he enjoyed the moment. Bob with 1 o may not remember the specifics of our day or week but I’m confident that he’ll have an overall feeling of enjoyment!

One day this past week Bob woke up at 2 am, confused and thinking he had to be ready for family coming over.  He fretted over being late while I tried to convince him to come back to bed and get some sleep.  He got dressed and went to the family room and settled in his comfy chair.  Once he fell asleep, I was able to sleep a few more hours.  Needless to say, it was a rough start to our day.   Once it was really morning, we went to nearby Lindo Lake for a little walk and then on to the Lakeside Café for a nice breakfast on their patio.  It could have been a horrible day if I had focused on waking up early and being disrupted by his confusion.  Instead, I chose to roll with the flow knowing I could fit a nap in later in the day.  My attitude sets the tone for his attitude most times.  That was evident today.  On our drive home, Bob told me several times that today had been a really nice day!  He had forgotten that it had begun with a rough start at 2 am and so did I. What a good moment we both had!

Jeremy Camp sings  a beautiful song titled  “Keep Me in the Moment” and here’s my favorite verse:

Singing Oh Lord keep me in the moment
Help me live with my eyes wide open
‘Cause I don’t wanna miss what You have for me
Singing Oh Lord show me what matters
Throw away what I’m chasing after
‘Cause I don’t wanna miss what You have for me
Keep me in the moment
Keep me in the moment
Keep me in the moment
‘Cause I don’t wanna miss what You have for me

Yes, it will still be hard to not have the shared memories but living one day, one moment, at a time will be my focus.

July 2020 visit from sister Marti and her hubby Greg


I’m learning more about dementia/Alzheimers than I really ever wanted to know.  My personality is such that I want to read, watch documentaries, attend support groups, join in webinars, take Zoom classes, and dig into the subject.  Do I think I’ll be better as a caregiver if I do this?  I guess.  And that’s my goal—to be a loving, gentle, and kind caregiver to Bob with 1 o. 

But day to day living with Bob is the biggest way to discover what dementia/Alzheimer’s is really like.  No amount of preparing can really prepare you!

I always thought the Bob would be able to hang on to the memories that were important or meaningful.  Doesn’t it make sense that special memories have a special place in his heart, and nothing can erase them? Obviously, I thought those memories would be embedded permanently in one’s heart.  I know when I think of significant memories, my heart feels the love, pain, pride, happiness, joy, and even the sorrow of those memories. Aren’t those memories part of one’s inner core?

Well I can tell you that they aren’t.  They only exist in one’s brain and because Bob’s brain is so atrophied and damaged, those memories don’t exist for him.  No amount of reminiscing, picture sharing, or even praying can bring those memories back alive in Bob’s brain. They don’t exist to him. They are gone just like they never happened.

It’s hard to believe that most of memories of the life we have lived over the last 41+ years is missing in his brain.  He doesn’t know where we met, where we married, where we lived over the years, who are friends were, what we did for fun, what vacations we took, what kind of work I did, what adventures we had with our families, and more. Bob doesn’t know important milestones and meaningful periods of our life.  I get so angry that those memories of OUR LIFE have been erased.  It makes me feel so very sad for BOTH of us.

So, what have I learned about the disease?  Dementia is a mean ugly disease.  It has robbed Bob of so much.  I can’t imagine what its like for him to not have those fantastic memories to look back on.  I’m not even sure what he thinks about his life.  My brain (and heart) are overflowing with significant remembrances that include him and that’s what fuels me to keep going and keep lovingly caring for him.

What fuels him?  What does he reminisce about?  What is he grateful for? What blessings does he count?

“Bob with 1 o” June 2020

Communication 101



1. the imparting or exchanging of information or news

synonyms: transmission, imparting, conveying, presenting, passing on…

2. the successful conveying or sharing of ideas and feelings

There’s little transmission, imparting, conveying going on in our home these days.  The successful conveying or sharing of ideas and feelings is almost nonexistent.  At this stage of Bob with one o’s dementia, this is the hardest thing for me. I’m experiencing  such an odd feeling of loneliness even though I’m sitting right next to my husband.

I’ve been told that dementia/Alzheimer’s causes the person with the disease to only catch a few of the words that are spoken in a sentence.  They just cannot grasp or retain the other words.  So, what they hear doesn’t make any sense to them.  When I say, “can you hand me the TV remote”, I have no idea what Bob is hearing but it’s not enough for him to understand.  He just stares at me even if I repeat the sentence 3 or 4 times.  It took me a while to realize that it was not his hearing (as I spoke louder and louder with each repeat), but it was a comprehension problem. Maybe he does not understand the word remote or maybe he misses several of the words that I say and he only hears “can hand me”.  I don’t know because Bob can’t explain.  I am only guessing what is going on inside his brain that makes a simple sentence so confusing.

When Bob talks to me there are times when I have no idea what he is talking about.  This is especially true when he is tired.  He will tell me something with lots of mixed up words and lots of incomplete sentences.  Even if I can’t understand what he is talking about, I try to show an interest, not scowl, and then respond as best I can. Quite often I say “that’s cool” or “oh yeah” just because I really don’t know what I am responding to. It’s a strange way to communicate. Talk about crazy relationship dynamics!

Bob’s talk often includes rambling sentences, mumbled words, mixed up pronouns, soft spoken words that I can’t hear, and made up words I’ve never even heard before.  Often, he’ll start a conversation and then lose his train of thought.  This really use to frustrate me and make me angry.  I would question Bob as to what he was talking about and ask him to repeat and clarify. A tense “give and take” would occur as he fumbled more and more with trying to find the words as I pushed him harder.  Fortunately for both of us, I no longer try that lousy technique! I’m learning.

An “ah-ha moment” recently made me come to terms with all of this.  Now I realize that Bob must feel equally frustrated when I talk to him.  If he is not able to understand what I am saying or asking, he must think that I’m not speaking clearly. I’m now sure that Bob must think it’s me that is making this difficult for him. Communication just isn’t going to be how it used to be and will only worsen as this disease progresses.  Whether it be that he cannot understand me, or I cannot understand him, it’s going to be extremely hard on both of us.

My goal is to be a loving wife and gentle caregiver and make the best of our days together. I’ll try to speak in clear sentences, use simple terms, NOT use logic or reasoning, and repeat what I’m saying if needed. If sometimes Bob just doesn’t understand or even respond to me, I’ll try to accept that and not overreact.

When Bob is trying to tell me something, I will listen and encourage him to take his time. I will try not to be annoyed or critical. I won’t correct him or walk away in frustration. As you probably suspect, I’ve done all of these things many times, so I know that they don’t help.

I plan on communicating with smiles, kisses, handholding, and lots of good food and slow walks.  If our days end up being spent in silence, so be it. Bob will know what I’m saying.

Celebrating our April 2020 Birthdays!

P.S.  I wrote this blog over the course of a couple of days and I’ve had a chance to think it over before I published it.   I want to clarify that this communication craziness is not 100% of the time.  There are moments and times when we can actually talk.  Usually it’s in the morning when Bob’s fresh and more alert.  The conversations are simple, but they still exist.  I think I’m hyper-focused on the lack of conversations as we are entering our 10th week of quarantine. The isolation has been hard. Pre-Coronavirus days, we had a social life. We loved having friends and family over so that we had the chance to talk with others. Our church outings with family filled a social as well as spiritual void.  Going to the Zoo, SeaWorld, Balboa Park, beach, and movies filled up the quiet moments.  Now the days are long and sometimes boring. I can’t wait to fill our house up with family and friends and once again enjoy the successful conveying or sharing of ideas and feelings! The sooner, the better.

Is this for Real?!

“Reality continues to ruin my life” is a popular quote by Bill Watterson of Calvin and Hobbes fame.

I read this quote recently and my first thought was “isn’t that the truth”!  I wrote the quote down on a scratch pad and have re-read it occasionally over the past few weeks now.  I have had the time to ponder it often as we are on our 7th week of the coronavirus lockdown and we have nothing but time on our hands! This is our new reality.

But, the reality of my life is wonderful. Even though “Bob with 1 o” has dementia, he still recognizes me and always has a smile, a hug, and a few kisses for me. I’m living “one day at a time” and today is good.

We have a lovely home to live in and quarantining here is more than comfortable.  The heat and the AC work great and both have been used during the ever-changing weather we’ve been having.  We have been fortunate to get Vons’s Grocery deliveries regularly and some fresh organic produce from an online Farmer’s Market in Carlsbad.  What we lack has been brought to us by friends and neighbors—we have even had a toilet paper delivery, a hand sanitizer delivery, and an ice cream delivery.  All the essentials!! Isn’t that reality great?

Although we are following “Stay at Home” orders, Bob and I still like to get out for a stroll. We are limited on where we can go with parks and beaches closed.  We have a nice open space behind our home and lately we find ourselves enjoying that area.  Until this lockdown, we did not visit that area much. It is a little gem right in our own backyard.  That’s a reality that is fantastic!

We have FaceTime!  We used FaceTime before but now it really is our favorite way to stay connected.  Bob has learned that he can talk to those faces on the phone and they talk back.  Occasionally he is not sure who they are, but he seems to enjoy the smiles and the visits.  Yes, Bob asks them some “odd” questions sometimes—my favorite was when he asked his granddaughter how her sex life was! Reality provides lots of grins and giggles!

Bob misses going to church the most of all and asks constantly when we will be able to go again.  He misses the worship music and time with family, and of course, eating waffles out afterwards!  But the new reality of “on-line church” is filling in the void with wonderful music and meaningful messages—all in the comfort of our home, in our PJ’s while sipping coffee.  Can’t be disappointed with that reality.

Self-distancing and isolation are a harsh reality but out of it has come renewed connections.  Family, friends, and neighbors are reaching out to us, checking in on us, bringing us treats and supplies, and showing compassion.  What a wonderful feeling it is to know that others think of us. I love that new kinder reality!

So, I am going to toss away that first quote and I think I’ll ponder on this one for now.

Don’t try to escape your reality…

Make it everything you want it to be!


My first career was in the restaurant business. I started as a hostess and then a food server, a cocktail waitress, and a bartender. I worked quickly into a management position. I wasn’t very tolerant of lazy workers, crazy explanations, and lame excuses. In 1979 at an employee Christmas party, I was given a gift of a bright yellow apron emblazoned with big letters which read “GET A GRIP”.

It was a statement I made frequently in response to any craziness by my staff. I would say GET A GRIP and my employee would recognize my displeasure and frustration with their behavior. What did it mean? Cut it out. Wise up. Stop with the lame excuses. Don’t lie to me. Get real. Stop goofing off. Just GET A GRIP!

I have come to realize that that is how I was then and how I am now. I like people with good common sense and a certain level of maturity. I’m not good with people who ask for advice and then not take it. I’m not good with people that have lame excuses for their bad behavior. I am not tolerant of people that make the same mistakes over and over. I am extremely intolerant of people that exaggerate every story or just blatantly lie. I am frustrated by people that don’t accept responsibility for their actions. Given a chance, I would tell people with any of these rotten (as I see them!) behaviors to GET A GRIP!

So now the joke is on me. As his dementia progresses, Bob has become more and more delusional, super confused, and constantly mixed up. His lack of short-term memory causes him to repeatedly ask the same questions over and over. Bob’s lack of long-term memory causes him to not know much of his or our personal history. He sees my suggestions and corrections as my being bossy. Bob’s lack of common sense has him making odd comments. His lack of filter has him telling unacceptable jokes and asking inappropriate questions. Bob tells the same crazy made-up story over and over. He tells lies and thinks they are truths. He recreates history. So many times a day, I find myself thinking, “BOB GET A GRIP”!

But thankfully I don’t say it. Bob can’t GET A GRIP.  Bob can’t control his behavior or change his comportment. Unlike my ex-employees, it is not his fault. Bob has no idea that his behavior is something that I consider to be annoying. It’s just his disease. It’s out of his (or my) control.

So as Bob moves further and further away from the Bob he once was, I must rewire my own old way of thinking and tell myself to GET A GRIP.

Old Habits die hard.

Old Ox Pacific Beach 1979  and today in my kitchen!

Corona-virus, California Lock-down, and the Zoo!

Me: Just a reminder that we can’t leave the house due to the Corona-virus.

Bob: I’m ready to go to Corona with you when you are.


Me: This Corona-virus issue is getting serious.

Bob:  I hear that they arrested the guy who is giving the pills to people that are killing them.


Bob: What are we doing today?

Me: We are staying home and self-isolating.

Bob: OK, the zoo sounds good.


Me: In a few minutes we can Face Time with your daughter Julie and sing Happy Birthday to her.

Bob: Let’s take her to lunch.

Me: She’s on lock down.  We’re on lock-down. Everyone is on lock-down. Restaurants are closed.

Bob: Really?  Maybe if it weren’t raining we could go to the zoo.


Bob: I’ve heard it’s a candy that is poison and it’s making everyone sick.  I’ve had one in my hand but I haven’t eaten it.


Bob: My golfing buddies called and we’re meeting them for dinner.

Me:  Restaurants are closed and I never heard the phone ring.  Are you sure that they called?

Bob: Yes, and they will be mad if we don’t go.


Bob: I heard a little more about the corona-virus.  I promise I’ll be on the lookout and make sure no one poisons our food.  That would be murder if they did.


Bob: Will we be meeting our Kinfolk (I love that term) at church?

Me: No, Churches are closed but we can watch church on line on my computer.

Bob: Can we meet them for lunch afterwards?

Me: No, we’re on lock-down.  Restaurants are closed.

Bob: OK, I guess we can go to breakfast without them this time.


Me: we can go for a walk as long as we stay 6 feet apart from anyone and don’t touch anything.

Bob: How about Sea World?

Me: They are closed.  Everyone and Every place is on lock-down.

Bob: How about the Zoo then?


Me: (while out for a walk) Yikes, something just moved in the bushes.  Maybe a lizard!

Bob: Maybe it’s that bug that is making everyone sick.  Don’t touch it!


Me: After you empty the house trash you should make sure you wash your hands.

Bob: Why? I washed them when I showered this morning.


Bob: We need bananas.  Let’s go to the market.

Susan: We are on lock-down.  I’ll see if someone can pick that up for us.

Bob: We need watermelon.

Susan: We are on lock-down.  I’ll see if someone can pick that up for us.

Bob: We need marmalade.

Susan:  We may have to do without some things until we are off of the lock-down.

Bob: We need cookies.  Let’s go to the market.


Bob: How about we go to the mall and shop for birthday presents for each other.

Me: The mall is closed and we are on lock-down.  Maybe in a few weeks we could do that.

Bob: OK, do you want to go to the zoo instead?


Bob: What do you want to do today?

Me: We’re on lock-down.  We’ll just be staying home.

Bob: OK, I’ll take a nap.  If you decide to go somewhere, wake me up.


Me: Kyle and Elizabeth are quarantined at home as Kyle was possibly exposed to someone that possibly has the corona-virus.  They’ll both be working from home for a couple of weeks.

Bob: Oh when are they coming here?  Can I go with you to the airport and pick them up?
Do you think they want to go to the Zoo with us?


Bob: What do you want to do for our birthdays?

Me: We’ll have to wait and see if we are still on lock-down.  We might not be able to do anything.

Bob: OK, How about a cruise on one of those big ships?


And this is just Week 1!!!

“Think of the patience God has had for you and let it resonate to others. If you want a more patient world, let patience be your motto”
― Steve Maraboli, Unapologetically You: Reflections on Life and the Human Experience

And these are just some of the many reasons Bob loves the Zoo!